Day three without a functioning phone. Today a grasped into my right pocket only to remember that i was alone. My hand lay there motionless for a second before i slowly retract it in disappointment. Work provided a distraction but once break time came i was left sitting there for 15 minutes staring into the soul of a week old muffin on the table. For the first time in my life i related to an inanimate object. It longed to be eaten as i longed to be released from this phoneless hell. Break time is over, on my way back to my department I again grasp into the empty void of my pantalones. I accidently touch my ween ween and i have a thought. But what would be the point without being able to look at mercy heal me. I finish my shift and lumber back home where i use a 5 year old tablet to send streaks. It takes 5 minutes to send but once it is done i’m glad as I now get to escape this primitive stone age through the portal that is my PC. But as i distract myself from inevitable death I hear Wulfske recite the Emoji Movie script and I lose all hope . I relent my grasp on this world, I drift into the endless abyss that is general chat