We have all seen stupid movies, such as Leprechaun in Space or Robo Shark. Highly cheesy films. But nothing compares to the abomination that was Krampus.

If there was a fucking storm that came out of no where like that then how the fuck would the government not go crazy.

I love how everyone on the fucking city disappears except the family and a random guy like it’s the fucking rapture.

Of course the parents are going to just let their stupid bitch child out to find her boyfriend too. And when out she gets killed by a fucking tiny toy. Not only did she not try to run but how did she get fucking killed.


And what the fuck is with that stupid monster that basically got all the kills. This isn’t fucking Tremors it’s Krampus. I don’t want some invisible ground penis eating everyone. And it only has the bite size of a dog when biting the one uncle.


That uncle, despite admittedly making me cum a few (5) times during the initial viewing, had an aim worse than fucking James Bond villains and storm troopers combined. I wanted to some sexy wrestling between him and Krampus. But no I see fucking them fighting toys.


The robot beats their asses and he’s like fucking KillGore from (My Life as a Teenage Robot).

A nightmare FredBear plush also kicks their ass with a harpy angel.


Arguably the most irritating villain was the fucking clown, besides the Penis Worm. How could he dodge those shots like he was fucking John Wick. And not get killed. I wanted his ass to get splattered almost as much as I do Stuart Little. The kids just let him eat them. I’d see if he could swallow my whole cock. I’d fill up his long ass throat like a water bottle. I’d really like to see the Uncle in some porn with him. Honestly if they did it right then and there it would have made up for the other shit. I’d love to have him fondle his testicles while swallowing his huge cock. I’m getting hard just typing this.


Those elves were fucking pointless and I want to talk more about the uncle. When he was gone the movie should have ended. Stupid ass kids. That baldish head is just so dreamy. I’d love to lick it. And Steve fucking Harvey has a restraining order on me. God damn that a hole. I hope he gets eaten by the penis worm.



Fuck this I’ll make my own ending




Krampus opens his bag of “toys” and has kinky sex with the clown and the uncle.

I would type it but it’d cum myself just thinking it.

I’ll fantasize the three some in my head now.


Maybe a foursome, I’ll think myself into it 🙈